Treatment centers are shuttering. . .
I've lost count on how many weeks COVID-19 has been wreaking havoc on the economy, but it's several.
Aside from the economy, however, is the ever increasing concern that people who need help aren't able to get it. Many treatment centers and halfway houses are trying to respond in a responsible manner, and several of them are closing their doors and opting for a virtual experience. Most inpatient centers are business as usual while some outpatient programs are improvising. Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, is offering RecoveryGo, a virtual option for at-home treatment.
You might be thinking, "How the heck is this going to work?" or "I won't be able to handle my loved one at home!". He or she NEEDS to be at a treatment center or NEEDS to be at a halfway house.
It is normal to be concerned. Change is hard. The truth is, there are so many professionals behind these programs. They know what they are doing. Trust in their knowledge and let go. Ask yourself, "Can I control this?". The answer is a simple and clear "no".
Instead. . .
What can you do to support your loved one?
1) Be grateful.
2) Help them with the technology.
3) Encourage them.
4) Accept them.
5) Practice self-care.
Did you notice something about these five ideas? Each one requires you to look inward, at yourself.
Being grateful requires you to consider how incredible it is that we are able to meet virtually. Twenty years ago that would not have been possible. What then? How amazing is it that technology is so helpful!
Helping them with the technology is something simple you can do if your loved one is struggling with the video feed, setup, etc. Please do NOT use this step as a way to control your loved one. If they appear to need help with the technology, help them. Do not go out on your own, set up the computer, and ask them to sit down. This is their program.
We can always support and encourage our loved one in their program. Be mindful of your language and check in with yourself. Be empathetic and understanding. This is new for them and it is likely to be a bit frustrating. Encourage but hold your boundaries.
Accept them. If your loved one decides to "skip out" on a session or not participate at all, please know this is not something you can control. If your loved one decides to continue using, that is not something we can control. Ask yourself, "Can I accept {name of loved one} just as he or she is, using or not using?". Reflect on how your answer makes you feel. There is no right or wrong answer. Just listen to yourself. Journaling can be a helpful tool for this.
Do NOT forget about yourself in all of this. Take care of yourself. Practice your self-care. Go for a walk or run, chat with your friends, do the things that fill up your heart. Fill up your cup so you can be the best version of yourself for the people you love. Its not an optional activity - it's necessary.
Let me know your thoughts, concerns, and questions. Sending you love and virtual hugs!
~Melanie
